Okay.  Rant today.  Specifically, a rant about little things that other students do that drive me up the wall.  Don’t get mad a me for being a Grade A Beeotch.  I’m a Virgo.  Being nit-picky is in my nature.  I do it out of love.

Let me just say that I’ve probably been guilty of most, if not all, of these things at some point in time.  I get it.  But sometimes, those little things just start to grate on your last nerve, ya dig?

So here you are.  The Things That Drive Me Crazy: College Student Edition.  (Although, I kind of feel like these situations can apply to anybody who works in an office, anybody who’s been on an airplane, anybody who’s every been out in the world at some point…)

1. The person who chomps his/her gum like a cow.

[photocredit]

Anybody who knows me at all can attest to the fact that I have major issues with noise.  Let me be more specific: I have major issues with annoying and/or cringe-worth noises (i.e., slurping cereal, nose blowing, forks scraping on plates).  I get it: gum is amazing and it helps you concentrate.  Just please, please, please, chew your gum like a human and not a 700 pound bovine.

2. The person who eats a stinky snack.

Um, I don’t mean to be rude, but can you please get your egg salad sandwich out of my nostrils?  How am I supposed to learn about action potentials when I’m trying not to gag on the putrid fumes emanating from your meal.

3. The person who packs up early

This makes my hair stand on edge.  I always feel horrible for the professor, I have a hard time finishing up my notes, and it gives me major anxiety.  I’m not kidding.  When I hear 200 people packing up their things, I want to turn around and scream, “YOU WON’T GET OUT ANY FASTER EVEN IF YOU SHOVE YOUR LAPTOP INTO YOUR BAG 3 MINUTES BEFORE CLASS IS OVER!”  I realize that this makes me super lame.  I’m okay with it.

4. The person who will sit right next to you even if there are a billion seats left

This is kind of ironic because I’m a fairly touchy-feely person.  However, not only does it feel super awkward when some random person decides to plop down two inches away from me, despite the 300 other open seats, but I get claustrophobic if I’m sandwiched in between two people.  I try to sit in the aisles for this reason, but, as you can surmise, there isn’t an unlimited number of aisle seats.

5. The person who takes his/her shoes off

I hope you don’t mind if I vomit.  And yes, I took both of the above pictures in class, on separate occasions.  If you’re going to de-shoe, at least have a pedi.  Can we agree on those terms?

…..

Okay, guys, rant is over.

I pinky promise I’m still a nice, bubbly young woman and not a mean, grumpy, crotchety old lady.

Yet.